Team Budd Zoo

Please consider supporting Team Budd Zoo in our efforts to raise money for SOFT (Support Organization for Trisomy 18, 13 and Related Disorders) through their Stroll for Hope event. 

We will be "strolling" in the 3rd Annual Stroll for Hope on Thu, July 18th at this year's SOFT conference in Providence, RI.  Funds raised go towards helping SOFT provide its resources and services to many families.  You can view some of those resources on their website: http://www.trisomy.org. SOFT is a 501(c)(3) that has been supporting the trisomy community since 1980! No donation is too small!

==> DONATE HERE <==  

Donating through the firstgiving.com website is simple, fast and totally secure. It is also the most efficient way to support my fundraising efforts.

Many thanks for your support -- and don't forget to forward this to anyone who you think might want to donate too!

THANK YOU from Team Budd Zoo!

Team Budd Zoo - 2011 Stroll for Hope - Chicago, IL

Team Budd Zoo - 2012 Stroll for Hope - St. Louis, IL

Some of the 2012 trisomy stroll participants

TAG-Teaming the SOFT Stroll for Hope

SOFT (Support Organization For Trisomy 18, 13, and Related Disorders) is a volunteer organization that offers support for parents who have had or are expecting a child with a chromosome disorder (especially Trisomy 18 and Trisomy 13), and education to families and professionals interested in the care of these children.  Every year they hold an annual SOFT Conference which provides an opportunity for grieving families to celebrate the lives of their children and learn skills to help them in their grief. It also offers an opportunity for families of living children to come together and spend time with families who understand their daily struggles, medical concerns and stresses, and the joys found in having a trisomy child. Most importantly, it offers opportunities for doctors to get hands-on experience with trisomy children through a medical clinic offered to all trisomy attendees, and provides important up-to-date education opportunities to families and medical professionals alike.

I am excited and honored because I will be representing the Trisomy Advocacy Group (TAG) at a conference session, along with several other TAG Board members. Our session is entitled "How to Advocate for your Trisomy Child".


All of the TAG Board Members attending the SOFT Conference will also be involved in a conference Stroll for Hope event that is designed to raise funds for SOFT. Some of the money goes to future conference costs, and some of the money goes to SOFT's general funds for operating costs.  I fully support SOFT and can attest to the positive impact it can have on families no matter where they are in this journey. Please consider supporting TAG's efforts to help SOFT by donating towards our TAG Team's SOFT Stroll for Hope fundraising efforts!


Here are some photos from the SOFT Stroll for Hope event in Chicago, IL in 2011. This is our Budd Zoo Team! But this year, we will have a TAG Team instead!

The Budd Zoo Team posing in our 2011 Stroll for Hope position.

Here is the back of our team Budd Zoo t-shirts. The design was created by our son, Elijah. We then used  ink jet t-shirt transfers to put them on matching t-shirts.

Go Team Budd Zoo! Notice how Elijah is holding Rebekah's hand. :-)

PLEASE DONATE to our TAG Team SOFT Stroll for Hope here: https://www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/TrisomyAdvocacyGroup/StLouis1

Find out more about SOFT's Annual Conference, to be held in July at St. Louis, MS this year:

http://www.trisomy.org/conference/

To learn more about SOFT, please visit -

website: http://www.trisomy.org/

facebook support group page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TrisomySOFT/

To learn more about Trisomy Advocacy Group (TAG), please visit - 

website: http://trisomyadvocacy.org/

facebook organization page: https://www.facebook.com/TrisomyAdvocacyGroup

facebook support group page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/T18Mommies/

Karen for First Lady!

Michael and I made plans to attend our first ever Republican Party even - a meet and greet dinner with Senator Santorum at a local restaurant. The thought came to me about an hour before we had to leave that I should give him a note with a picture of us with him from last year and an invitation to his wife to join our online community. Here's my short note. I included several of Rebekah's info cards and a picture of our family.

Dear Mr. Santorum,

We had the pleasure of meeting you at the SOFT Conference last summer in Chicago!

A group of us have started a nonprofit called Trisomy Advocacy Group – a group meant to educate and help parents advocate for their trisomy 18, 13, and any other trisomies not currently represented by a national organization. Like you, we have had our share of disappointing encounters with the medical community, despite our full trisomy 18 daughter being 32 months old. We would love to talk to Karen or you about it! We would also love to give Karen some trisomy support. We have a great moms group on facebook, and she could even join under a different name if she didn’t want the attention. I cannot tell you how much we have learned from our moms group and how it has helped us to be better advocates. God bless! We will be voting for you!

Michael and Susan Budd

I held a folded paper in my hand waiting for the opportunity to slip it into his hand when I had my chance to meet him as he made his way through the room greeting everyone there. We arrived 40 minutes before it was scheduled to start - good thing as he started speaking only a few minutes later. I would have to wait until after his speech to get my moment.

As I struggled admist the crowd to see Santorum as he spoke, I can honestly say I felt an amazing presence in the room. I believe this man to be a man of character, speaking words of truth - someone who can bring integrity back to the White House. There is no candidate that I agree with 100% on every issue, but I would take someone who I agree with on 90% of the topics and who I know would be true to their word. 

My excitement suddenly grew though!  I didn't expect to see his wife, Karen, standing next to him. For some unexplained reason, my eyes suddenly welled up with tears as I felt an inexplicable bond with this woman. The letter I wrote was really intended for Karen, but I didn't dream I would see her at this event since Rick was making his grassroots tour across the Upstate area of SC and visiting location after location every few hours. I was so excited! I could now give the letter to Karen directly!

The speech finished and I continued to push my way through the crowd waiting for my opportunity to get to the Senator. But as I got closer, I saw Karen was no longer by his side! My heart dropped. I asked a ady who had been standing there if she knew where Karen went. She said she heard her saying something about the bathroom.

So I snuck off to the bathroom to 'corner' her despite Michael's urgings to give her some privacy. Besides her, that bathroom was empty! I patiently waited until she came out of the bathroom stall and washed her hands, then I made my move! I quickly introduced myself as a fellow trisomy 18 mom, my heart welling with a pride that only another trisomy mom would understand. I gave her the letter and quickly said a few words about our Trisomy Advocacy Group, Trisomy 18 Mommies group, and my family.

Karen started asking me questions and took a glance at the letter and my info card with Rebekah's picture. She recognized Rebekah! She said, "You have a blog, don't you? It's beautiful, I loved it!" My heart burst with pride and I suddenly had the urge to run home and add to my long-neglected blog! My writer's block had been broken!  We chatted some more about advocacy and these words flowed from her mouth, "I have such a passion for this! [referring to trisomy 18 advocacy] I am so tired of doctors telling us our children are 'incompatible with life'."

She asked me about Rebekah's story. How did it start? What did the doctors do/say? What did we do with Rebekah? We chatted for long enough in the bathroom that someone from their security group finally knocked on the door, gave me an evil eye, and asked if she was okay. Before I could say a word, she said everything was fine. She gave me a hug and we left the bathroom. I paused her so Michael could snap a picture of us together. Then her son, Dan, gently told his mother they had to move on to the next location and were getting ready to leave. Michael just looked at me disbelieving I actually DID have the guts to stop her in the bathroom after all!

Let me tell you, I love this woman! She would be such a great First Lady for our country. She is as down-to-earth as Rick, not afraid to shake hands with those around her, and has such a kind heart. I am most honored to meet her, even though I thought it meant I missed my opportunity to speak with her husband. But she had my letter! So I knew he would at least get to see the picture from last summer of him with Rebekah, Michael, and I.

But my evening wasn't finished! I made my way across the room to our table, and I squeezed next to Senator Santorum as he was heading out a side exit door. I quickly stuck out my hand, and reminded him that we had met at the SOFT conference in Chicago last July. He gave me a hug, and asked about our daughter. He, too, gets my vote for the White House!

My Road To Advocacy...

I was selected this summer to participate in a federally-funded program called 'Partners in Policy Making' which is a leadership training program that helps family members learn the history of disibility law and how to become an effective advocate. Here in South Carolina, it is run through a group called Pro Parents, and they select about 15-20 people a year to participate. I get to travel to our state capital for two day training sessions that will occur over five months, learn about the law-making process at local, state and federal levels, meet speakers who are experts in topics essential to advocacy, and hopefully learn how to effectively advocate so I can better help Rebekah and others like her!   Anyone can petition to participate in the program, and if it is not available in your state as a hands-on learning process, there are free online tutorials at the Partners in Policy Making website that cover the technical information learned during the training.

I FINALLY got around to creating and ordering my own personal advocacy cards in August! It has only taken me a year of talking about it to finally get it done. The hard part was coming up with exactly what I want the cards to convey in such a small space. Because my passion is for advocating for children with trisomy 18, 13 and similar conditions, I chose several organizations that support the trisomy journey - especially those in the journey with living children. I obviously couldn't include every organization, but I can say that these organizations make a difference in the lives of families that choose life for their trisomy kids. Of the amount of funds that goes into these organizations, almost all of it goes right back out to supporting families - you can see the fruits of their labor. The list of people they have helped is long, and their leadership is full of integrity. I have been personally helped by all of them -

• Trisomy Advocacy Group helps give a voice to those who have none, and helps connect new parents to parents willing to support and help them face doctors and hospitals not trisomy frirendly.
• Noah's Never Ending Rainbow helps families with living children and bereaved parents who need a little financial help. They helped fund 14 families attending the SOFT conference this past summer - we were one of them.
• Support Organization for Trisomy (SOFT - trisomy.org) provides a way for trisomy families to connect - no matter where they are in the journey. They put out quarterly publications with lots of useful medical information, and have medical advisors on board that are 'experts' on trisomy kids. There is an annual conference that is incredible - for both those with living children, and those who have lost children. It truly is a wonderful support organization.
• Hope for Trisomy offers comforting Gemma's Bears and Payton's bears to trisomy families, funds research projects, and helps advocate on behalf of these children.
• There is another organization that I wish I would've added - Prenatal Partners for Life. They have helped countless friends of mine, and the founder recently lost her full trisomy 18 son. They support families with adverse prenatal diagnosis that choose to carry to term.

This is the front of the card...

...and this is the back side.

There are many other organizations that support the trisomy community, I listed them in this blog entry months ago.  But the ones that made it to my cards are the ones that have supported me most in my journey.

I would really love to be able to go to medical conferences, universities, and any place else where I can show off Rebekah and her trisomy friends and explain that life-limiting does not mean incompatible with life, nor does it mean there is no quality of life. These children are special and have many things to teach us. Rebekah and I are looking forward to our advocacy opportunities and how we can make a difference for trisomy 18 awareness. I start my Partners in Policy Making classes in October - and I can't wait!

Stroll for Hope - TEAM BUDD ZOO

TEAM BUDD ZOOBack: Michael & Susan
Front (left to right): Isaiah (6), Jeremiah (8), Elijah (10) holding Rebekah (2), Josiah (4)

Please support TEAM Budd Zoo in a Stroll for Hope to raise money for SOFT.  Your tax-deductible donation of even a few dollars will go to help educate both families and the medical community about trisomy 18, 13 and related disorders!  Read below for more information...

When I was pregnant with Rebekah, the majority of the information I got from doctors and online resources were full of doom and gloom. We prepared for the worst. But when Rebekah ended up living and thriving, I was left without information on how to care for her. One of the few organizations I've found that actually has medical advisors and trisomy experts, as well as an international registry of trisomy 18/13 families, is Support Organization for Trisomy 18, 13, and Related Disorders (SOFT) - a nonprofit volunteer organization offering support for parents who have had or are expecting a child with a chromosome disorder (especially Trisomy 18 and Trisomy 13), and education to families and professionals interested in the care of these children. 

We are excited - all seven members of the Budd Zoo will be attending the SOFT Conference in Chicago in July! The conference will provide a free medical clinic for the SOFT kids, and Rebekah will be able to consult with 3 specialists to get additional advice on her care.  

As part of the conference activities, we will be participating in a Stroll for Hope event to raise money for SOFT. We are taking pledges/donations for our stroll around HOPE Hospital in Chicago, IL. Your donations are tax deductible and go to a great organization! And thanks to SOFT, our family has received a scholarship to help us offset the conference costs, and we want to be able to give back so other families can attend in the future. 

My plug for supporting SOFT (trisomy.org):
I encourage anyone facing a journey with a SOFT child, including the medical professionals that will care for them, to join this organization because of all the things they can provide:

• Help and support for families;
• Medical advisors who are experts on trisomy 18/13 kids;
• Materials available for care of trisomy kids;
• SOFT Times, a quarterly magazine full of informative articles, life experiences, practical information, summaries of latest research articles, tons of inspiring pictures of living and thriving children, and much more;
• New family packet that is a great resource.

I have found their materials to be awesome resources for our family and for Rebekah's doctors. The books include info like typical problems, recommended medical treatments, and growth curves for trisomy kids.

Most important - this is a volunteer run organization! Even the medical advisors are volunteer. All money donated to SOFT goes to subsidize conference costs, create informative materials for families, education opportunities, support of trisomy-related studies, and so many other good programs! It DOES NOT pay for salaries or projects in conflict with the purpose of the organization.

Thank you for your love and support of Rebekah, and children like her!

The Great Confession

I recently bought a book from SOFT - Support Organization for Trisomy 18 and 13 and Related Disorders called 'Care of the Infant and Child with Trisomy 18 or Trisomy 13' published just last year and based on compilation of recent data from trisomy children. According to the book, 90% of (T-18) pregnancies end in stillbirths or termination. Of those that survive, only 50% make it to one week old and only 10% to 1 year old. 90% of T-18 children have major heart defects, and at least 50% have kidney defects.

Tuesday evening, April 28, will mark Rebekah's second big milestone - the one week mark. I wait in eager anticipation knowing that she'll make this one!

We know we have a long and difficult road before us. Rebekah failed her newborn hearing screen, is on a heart/apnea monitor due to low heart rate and shallow breathing, and has a club right foot. She acts like a preemie in many ways, even though she was born at 38 weeks. This is most likely due to the chromosome disorder and the preemie like behaviors may not be something she ever grows out of. However, she is simply gorgeous and looks like a little China doll! She has no audible heart murmur (implying that any VSD seen in the ultrasounds is most likely gone), and her renal ultrasound showed TWO kidneys (we could only ever see one in the prenatal ultrsounds). Although the doctor thought her rectum might be superficial at birth, I can assure you it is working just fine and puts out many a poopy diaper all day long. Her esophagus is intact, she can suck long enough to take her food, and although she appears to have the typical T-18 clenched fists, she does open them and extend her fingers quite frequently. I do believe God has answered many prayers regarding Rebekah and has provided us with some of his miracles! She is a miracle child to behold! And she has even softened the hearts of several medical professionals who now see her as 'viable and living', not 'incompatible with life.' Praise God for his this gift!

Rebekah came home with us Monday afternoon April 27th. She is still a little below her birth weight (by 5 oz.), but she is eating fairly well - consuming up to 40cc per bottle by the time we left the hospital. We had the feeding tube (gavage feeding through the nose) removed and will only insert it if we cannot get at least 30cc by mouth during a feeding. We have been trained in infant CPR, gavage feeding and apnea monitoring. We have home health care set up for their first visit Tue and her first pediatrician appt on Wed. We also have an agreement with the NICU that we can readmit her should the monitor go off excessively or we fail to feed her enough. Other than being sleep deprived, we are probably as prepared as we can be for what lies ahead.

Despite all of these great joys, praises and milestones, Michael has had to watch me be a crying basket case over the last 2 days. He said I've come this far in sharing about Rebekah, so I need to be honest so that if any are chosen to follow my footsteps on this tough journey, they would know the full range of emotions that will be felt. Between my raging hormones, and the terrible prognosis of full trisomy 18 children (in terms of long term viability and capability), it was, quite frankly, a very bitter sweet day for me.

On the praise side, I am incredibly blessed and praising God for this time we have with sweet Rebekah. Oh how her brothers love her and pray for her! How tenderly Elijah hugged and kissed her today! Even Josiah was warming up to the idea that there was no longer a baby in my tummy but now one in my room! My prayer for sweet Rebekah all along has been that she would make an impact in this world - that her life would have meaning and purpose, and there is no doubt this is true! I bet there are a thousand people praying for this precious creation of God! I have received countless emails and facebook responses saying how this church and that church are praying for her, how individuals have been impacted by our story and brought to their knees in genuine prayer as they have never prayed before. I am watching my own kids grow in their faith. This is extremely humbling and unbelievable to be a part of such incredible 'heart' work! God is good indeed for answering so many prayers and renewing faith through one little tiny baby.

On the bitter side, I have spent the last two days as a complete basket case. I have not cried this much in my whole life, and it isn't all tears of joy. There are tears of fear, stress, doubt, loss of freedom, and even things I can't put into words because I am so ashamed to think them... I feel completely overwhelmed and I know my life is going to be very different from now on. I KNOW if won't always be true, but I currently feel like a prisoner to this little babe. I worry that I won't be able to meet the needs of my other children as I attend to her. I wonder how I will get it all done - the cooking, the cleaning, the homework, the normal household stuff. Then after all of these feelings (especially after praying for so long for time and hope) there is the guilt. How could I think these things about this child... the one I LOVE with all my heart and have prayed about for months? the child that Jesus loves and has entrusted to my care? The child that so many of you love too, even though you have never met her in person?

A friend of mine sent me a message the other day and said "In all this whirlwind of Rebekah and the birth . . . how are you doing? I think about how you'd probably like someone to take you into their arms and tell you everything is ok. You must be so weary." All I can say is she was right on the money!

So that is my confession to you. I figure if we are sharing this journey, then I wouldn't paint it all roses but give you the grim reality of it all. Oh, my faith is still strong, our resolve to be Rebekah's champion is firmly in place, but I am just a Mom and an imperfect one at that. Although I believe all of the scripture I quote and know that my strength comes through the Lord, I am still full of doubts, fear and resistance to this path that God has placed me on.

Then Michael reminds me that Holland is a nice place too.